I’ve been playing the social media scene now since 2012. That’s six years now that I have been sharing, posting, sharing, posting.
I had to scroll and scroll back to find my first profile pic.
Time shows the most in our kids hey? When you’re with them day in, day out, you don’t see them grow. This guy is now a good head size taller than me.
It’s 5am here. The house is quiet. My fire has still got a glow of red, which quickly turned into a rebirthed fireball quite quickly. I’ve made my first coffee for the day. A couple of lamps are on now, that show off that homely glow. I awoke at 4am and couldn’t sleep.
I’m a spontaneous personality but I am also a creature of habit. And when I get up each morning, my routine consist of:
- Coffee – fresh, creamy and warm
- I watch my sunrise
- I check the weather for the day, for the week
- Jump onto all the social apps, and check Facebook, Insty.
It’s been a routine now for years. And a few months ago, you would have been certain that there would have been a memory share, or a quote post or aghast a selfie pops up on your feed from me if we were “friends” online.
I sorta stopped posting on my personal page a couple of months ago. It wasn’t a decision that I had made like when you quit something and you have a quit date. It just happened. I thought I’m not going to post anything today. And the next day the same, and the next, the same.
I was unconsciously detoxifying myself from my online addiction. That addiction for gratification in way of little thumbs up or love heart notifications.
And it is an addiction for sure. I’ll put my hand up and admit that I loved those notifications. I loved when people and friends commented on my posts, even shared them. It was like a little warm hug.
My absence has allowed me to actually not grab my phone 24/7. Yes, I still go online, but through my detox and distance, I’m aware now of what I want to share.
Don’t get me wrong, Social Media and the Internet is beyond amazing. Having the ability to connect with your friends, like-minded people from all over the world at your fingertips is truly something else. I wouldn’t be able to write online if it wasn’t for the Internet. But I don’t want the algorithms of a digital world to consume my need for validation.
By disconnecting, I learnt to connect with myself. I had time to actually feel my feelings, whether they are nice or not so nice. I didn’t seek instant joy or sympathy. I rode through the lows and came out the other end with healing.
I'm learning again on learning about me. Plus, liking me through the process.
Going inwards helped me work on my outlook outwards.